Tag Archives: bazaar

style icon: dovima

posted by:  audra

get excited, kids!  i’ve been dying to do a bit on another model from the 1950s i’m currently obsessed with:  dovima.  she was born dorothy virginia margaret juba on december 11, 1927 & met her demise at the age of 62 on may 3, 1990 of liver cancer. a sagittarius!  of course!  and liver cancer?  that tells me she was likely a heavy drinker & smoker.  more sighs…  anyway, already nicknamed ‘doe’, she would later be known as ‘dovima’; a name she had for an imaginary friend as a child.  i read someplace that she created the name from ‘do’ for dorothy, ‘vi’ for victory, and ‘ma’ for her ma…but clearly she chose ‘dovima’ from taking the first two letters of her first & middle names (dorothy virginia margaret…obvs!).  well, either way, what a clever little cunt!

anyway, dovima came down with a pesky little thing called rheumatic fever at a tender young age.  typical treatment for rheumatic fever — and i should know; my mother had it when she was young, too — is lots & lots of bedrest…like, months at a time.  her doctor suggested a year, but her crazily over-protective mum made it something like seven years at home.  seven!  of course she would have an imaginary friend!  i had imaginary friends too…but looking back on it now, i’m pretty sure our house was just haunted.  anyway…again, moving on…

the short version…  she was trolliping down the sidewalk in nyc one day & was discovered by a vogue editor.  the very next day she had a photoshoot with jean patchett’s bff, irving penn(!).  soon she was wearing dior & balenciaga gowns on the covers of vogue & bazaar.

she retired in 1959 because she “…didn’t want to wait until the camera turned cruel.”  smart woman.  she spent all of her modeling money  (okay, does anyone else notice how uncannily alike we are?!  except for the catholic part, we’re practically twins!  i’m now convinced that i’m the shorter, stockier reincarnation of doe.  yes!), so she worked for awhile doing spokeswoman stuff & television spots.  in the seventies, she ended up hosting at restaurants & selling makeup.  fuck, i am really in for it!

during this time, dovima met the love of her life, casper west hollingsworth — a bartender — & was very happily married to him for only three years before west kicked the bucket.

i read that in 1984, she started hosting at the two guys pizzeria for some time…although two guys’ website says they’ve been around since 1988…hmm…curious…but on her ‘has been’ status, in 1987 she said:

“The only ‘has been’ is one who has been. You have to Have Been in order to be a has been.”

again with the clever cuntiness!  brilliant.  other dovima trivia to impress your friends with:  she was a comic book aficianado, a battered-wife of two abusive husbands, a dovout catholic (eek!), had a cameo in funny face with audrey hepburn & was the highest paid model of her time…at 75 bucks an hour.

okay.  enough of my yammering…

so, i totally don’t remember her part in funny face.  at all.  buuut, in my defense, i think i was like 8 when i last watched it!  i’m on it though…i’ll view it again very, very soon…if only for dovima; i rather hate musicals.  doesn’t she just make you wanna line your eyes, put on some red lippy & play dress-up?!  guess what i’m doing tonight…?!

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best day ever…?

posted by:  audra

wow.  so, i should be totally irritable & tired today…but for whatever reason, i’m not!  i woke up in an impeccably good state of well-being & it’s stuck with me all day. i have cramps, i only got 5 1/2 hours of sleep, the crack in my windshield spread even further this morning & i’ve had ’emerge’ in my head all day, & i don’t know where it came from.

you know what though?   i’m dealing with the cramps.  i’m not tired.  i’m blowing off getting the windshield fixed today because i don’t want the insurance people to fuck up my afternoon.  and fischerspooner kinda sounds good(?!).  it’s been like a gay discotheque everywhere i go today!  like babylon in queer as folk. what could possibly be causing all this euphoria?!  it’s sunny & nice out, but i normally wouldn’t go for that.   i took a little walk at lunch, read a magazine & smoked a ciggie in the sun, all the while wearing a sweater & didn’t sweat or get cranky!  this points to one of three things:

  1. something really bad is about to happen to me
  2. this is karmic payback for all the good things i do
  3. i dreamt a wet dream last night & my memory refuses to remember it

i’m hoping it’s the latter of the three.  the second thing would be nice too.  i deserve it.  i’m good to you people.

another thing made me happy today:  i read a little blurb in my new issue of harper’s bazaar about pulling out your older shoes from the closet.  there, gleaming next to this article, was a pair of wooden heels from chloé‘s spring 2006 line.  normally not a big deal, but these look astonishingly similar to the heels my mum gave me awhile ago…ones she wore in the seventies!  i totally have an excuse to wear them now. 

wanna watch the fischerspooner vid with me?!  just for fun?  of course you do!  now you will know what it’s been like in my head today!  it’s kinda rad, or at least parts of it are rad…just like me, i suppose.

*ps, this post has absolutely nothing to do with jessica stam.  i just felt like looking at her.

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cuffs, stuff & bouviers

posted by:  audra

i was just sitting around this evening, wishing i still owned a debbie gibson record…whilst listening to vintage kimmy gordon & thurston moore of course.  then i thought it wise to peruse the bible since i wasn’t about to purchase ‘lost in your eyes’ from itunes.

so much deliciousness, you guys.  i discovered jewelery designers, giles & brother. you have to visit the website. you just do. a brother & sister designing duo…& you know how i love incest a brother & sister working together with leather & metal(!).  fat leather cuffs, gold safety pin necklaces, screw cufflinks…yum.  of course their naughty internet police wouldn’t let me upload any nuggets to see…of course.  so you just have to go yourself — and ignore the rhinestone bangles.  and the seahorse charm.  and…

speaking of rad, sam & i watched the 1975 documentary, grey gardens tonight for the very first time.  i’ve been absolutely dying to see this film my entire life.  believe it.  i don’t know what the fuck took so long;  i’m obsessed with jackie kennedy…i painted a version of the portrait andy warhol did of her in a college painting class, & listened to ‘jackie’s strength’ by tori amos for weeks;  i ended up leaving my canvas there at the end of the term for a couple weeks, & lo & behold, it was gone when i went to fetch it.  i was heartbroken.   the house of yes is also one of my very, very favorite films ever.  again with the incest.  is that what i get for being an only child?  anyway.  the first time i saw that film, i wanted to splatter fake blood on myself,  glue macaroni to a pink suit & pull a jackie…

…so you can imagine my anticipation for this film.  the documentary follows jackie kennedy’s aunt & first cousin (edith “big edie” ewing bouvier beale & edith bouvier beale “little edie”) as they live in a complete hot mess of a gorgeous twenty-eight room mansion in east hampton.  but the mum & daughter haven’t any money, live in filth, sing constantly, don’t leave the house & have racoons residing in the attic…to which they feed wonder bread.  the health department nearly condemned the house because of its condition, but jackie stepped in & helped clean it up a spot.

this film made me feel crazy just watching it…it totally pulls you in as an eavesdropper, like the maysles brothers are geniuses of doing.  the living conditions of these women are absolutely disgusting, but little edie is still glamorous.  she’s always done up in hose, a skirt –pinned at the hip– heels & a headscarf…because she really hasn’t a hair on her head.  nor eyebrows.  oh god, is this my future?

i had totally forgotten halfway through the film that it was a documentary.  grey gardens is very john waters-esque, only without the divine divine & odor-rama.  it really crushed me that this beautiful estate was being wrecked by former debutantes…jackie must’ve been horrified by the release of this film.   little edie goes on & on about leaving grey gardens…how she hates the country & misses the city, but she never leaves.  it’s sad & hilarious at the same time.  the most gorgeous part of the film is near the beginning when little edie says, “it’s very difficult to keep the line between the past & the present, you know what i mean?”  i nearly passed.  out.  what with rufus wainwright being my bff & all…where have you been all my life?

looky-loo…feel the crazy:

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counterfeit luxe

posted by:  audra

nearly five years ago, i made one of the biggest mistakes of my life:  i bought a fake louis vuitton handbag from a street vendor.  in new orleans, of all places.  i don’t know why — i didn’t even want it that badly.  i’m so ashamed.  they have a bad reputation, being toted around by velour sweatsuit wearing mommies & such.   and they’re everywhere…so, clearly, i wasn’t thinking that day.   i wore the bag exactly two times.  the first time, i just felt stupid walking around with it because i knew it was a fake; and the second time the strap started to come apart.  i contemplated gluing it, but just the thought of gluing back together a fake vuitton made me nauseous.  from then on, i decided that would be the one & only fake designer handbag i would ever own.  dramatic, right?  yes, but there are a lot more reasons why you shouldn’t be trolloping around with a faux-luxe bag, besides the fact that it’s tacky.

i paraphrasesd & gussied up these little nuggets & fun facts from the january issue of harper’s bazaar, ‘the fight against fakes’ by dana thomas:

an estimated 7% of the $600 billion in annual world trade is counterfeit, & is likely repsonsible for the loss of 750,000 american jobs…of course not just handbags, but medicine, watches & even baby formula.  believe it.

when you purchase a counterfeited item, let’s say it’s a fake chanel 2.55 bag, you’re supporting human trafficking, child labor,  & gang warfare.  that’s because the counterfeiters use the money you paid to launder & then later commit the aforementioned dirty deeds.  bazaar’s reporter dana thomas went on a raid with some chinese police in guangzhou; they walked into a room with close to thirty dirty, tired children, ages 8-14 constructing fake dunhill, versace & hugo boss handbags on super old, crappy sewing machines.   i can see the dunhill & versace…but faux hugo boss?  really?  why?

that should be enough to deter you from pawing through racks of fake fendis in chinatown, but it gets better.  dana goes on to say that walking through an assembly plant in thailand, she saw several children, all under the age of 10.  the impoverished little beasts were sitting on the floor, putting together scads of counterfeit handbags.

“the owners of the assembly plant had broken the children’s legs & tied the lower leg to the thigh so the bones wouldn’t mend.  [they] did it because the children said they wanted to go outside & play.”

i’m not wild about kids, but that’s pretty fucking sick.  don’t even think about getting a fakey, kittens…if the inhumane conditions in which they’re produced don’t change your mind, then just think about how quickly your new, supposedly well constructed designer bag will fall apart on you…then everyone will know it’s a fake anyway!  save your pennies & buy the real thing.

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