posted by: audra
okay. check it:
last night, i did some exercise.
i did some more.
i have also read an entire book in less than 4 days & started another.
i’m not sure what’s going on with me, but i think it may have something to do with a little mini-mental-meltdown i had on sunday evening. i’ve realized that i have been lamenting about having a little extra cush on my tush for forever & we’re all way sick of it. but mostly, i’m pushing thirty & i don’t want to exit my twenties being unhappy with my fat-girl arms.
and i also want to read more because it will make me smarter, wittier, more clever & irresistible to be around.
so there. everyone wins! nobody wants to sit next to a dumb, dull fatty.
but wait! there’s more. i’ve decided to disclose to you my actual, real, bloody, raw weight. i’m not a typical girl in never wanting to reveal my weight, but it is a little humiliating to do in public. i did this to myself! mama’s lazy & the girl likes to drink. and sit. i can’t help it! ready? wait for it, suck in your beer gut, hold your breath…
my weight is one thing, my height — quite another. but anyway! i feel this will force me to keep it up; if i periodically write updates about my progress. so, get excited! your friend audra is about to get more attractive.